In the last weeks since I have written, God's fingerprints have firmly been stamped all over our collective lives as the South Africa Resource Team. His hand has so clearly guided the transformation that is occurring within my heart, our team, and on into Mpophomeni. He has been winding His thread through our journeys for nearly 8 months now since the dream began. He has been with us walking alongside us in the spiritual and relational valleys, winding/confusing paths I/we have experienced. Often in times like these it is difficult to see Him and understand His plan. On rare occasions it seems, God provides hilltop realizations/experiences. Opportunities to look back on the slope that lay behind, and fully recognize where God has been in it all. God has known all along the path we have wandered down as a team. A path that for nearly a month, winded unnecessarily, as we floundered about on our own. It is evident in reflecting on our preparation as a team, just how American and individualistic we were/are. This realization also allows me to understand a bit more of my struggle through this past year. I feel as though with each passing day in America, a part of Themba was lost. Themba meaning HOPE in Zulu, was one of the names I was dubbed by my closest friends here, namely Zwe and Khaniyi. The concept of myself as Themba, became a symbol of experiencing the fullness of God's love, life and joy. Slowly I began to lose sight of who God created me to be. I began to allow myself to be defined by other things beside Christ. I continually drifted and searched to no avail, for how I could continue on as Themba in America. As a result, I approached this summer and trip much less as a team and much more from the perspective of individuals, each with different personal expectations of our time in Mpophomeni. Each desiring the fullness that God offered and provided in various ways our previous time, but none knowing how to reach this intimacy and community. As I reflect on what God has done, I realize how He took my expectations of further community development/ministry experience, and molded it to His desires of what He intended to teach me. These passages drive straight to the heart.
-"Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness. Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives in the light, and there is nothing in them to make them stumble. But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them." 1 John 2:9-11
We were desiring to love Mpophomeni well, but were struggling to love each other well. As a result we were staggering about in the dark, desiring God's glory amongst the people, but clueless as to how we could take part. In short, the Holy Spirit conquered the fear and darkness within us. Fears of vulnerability and the darkness of our selfish nature, into the light of HIS love. We were depriving God of glory within our pride, our stubbornness and inability to acknowledge bitterness/apathy in our hearts.
-"We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister." 1 John 4:19-21
In my heart there was great dissatisfaction that we were not experiencing the fullness of what God has for us. Praise God that He has broken our individual selves down, and is busy creating something new in us. Something that honors HIM so much more completely and fully than we individually are capable of! As this transformation has occurred, God's blessing is so clearly upon us and our interactions within the Family Centre. There has been an incredible change within our hearts and minds that can only come from HIS spirit. The JOY He affords us as a result is indescribable and pure. Hallelujah. It is with open hands that we desire to offer up these last weeks. God, glorify yourself in and through us. As we each day come to love eachother more and better, out of God's love within us, God is opening doors of relationships and conversations not possible without Him. Each day we are drawn closer and closer to the heart of God. The best place to possibly be, at "Indawo Yothando." A place of love!
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Saturday, July 2, 2011
July Already?
I am officially 12 days in. In other terms of measurement this equates to:
- 3 showers
- Easily over 36 cups of rooibos/coffee
- Approximately 16 bowls of corn flakes
- 1 book read
Time seems to be doing anything but slowing down. Not that the pace of life is stressful or fast, it's not. I am actually finding plenty of time to "slow down" each evening. Working on maintaining a consistent journal. So much happens each day, it is a daunting task to even begin jotting things down. Staying motivated in that regard is crucial. I know the purpose of it is to one day be able to look back and see God's faithfulness... I desire that one day, now it just seems arduous. Nonetheless, God is definitely making Himself known daily here. In those small things, the smiles, the expansive sky, a loving touch. (definitely feeling the love these days considering touch is my love language.)
A touch can be such a humanizing thing and an incredible human expression of God's love. So many of the children have a deep longing for this acknowledgement, in physical form, that they no doubt deserve yet likely have been depraved of in their short lives. It's a desire that is innate in us. To touch and be touched. A Godly exchange in humanity. These are moments that I cherish, these are moments that I hope God will grant me increasing sensitivity, that I might take note of Him around me.
In other news, we have gotten together for our first time with the Howick Community Church youth, to begin some relationships with them with our ultimate hope to bridge understanding between them and the township youth. Be praying for God's direction and hand in this. Within ourselves we can do nothing. Which is a relief that we can place this in His hands and just make ourselves available.
In other requests, safety here in the township is a risk that we cannot ignore. So long as we keep our wits about us and stay street-wise, we are just fine. There have been some trip ups, so we could definitely use some prayer with that regard!
Major praise to acknowledge. The Mpophomeni Family Center ministry, it's staff, social workers, child care, are amazing! God's hand is upon this ministry, and boy is it apparent. It astounds me how perfectly each staffer fits their roles, the way their skills and passions match up to exactly what is expected of them! They are seriously some of the most incredible people I know. If there is one thing that I would love to emerge from this summer with, would be the knowledge that we provided these brothers and sisters in Christ an encouragement. Time to wrap it up, much love and peace to you all. Hopefully we can keep you updated a bit better this coming week! Sala Kahle!
- 3 showers
- Easily over 36 cups of rooibos/coffee
- Approximately 16 bowls of corn flakes
- 1 book read
Time seems to be doing anything but slowing down. Not that the pace of life is stressful or fast, it's not. I am actually finding plenty of time to "slow down" each evening. Working on maintaining a consistent journal. So much happens each day, it is a daunting task to even begin jotting things down. Staying motivated in that regard is crucial. I know the purpose of it is to one day be able to look back and see God's faithfulness... I desire that one day, now it just seems arduous. Nonetheless, God is definitely making Himself known daily here. In those small things, the smiles, the expansive sky, a loving touch. (definitely feeling the love these days considering touch is my love language.)
A touch can be such a humanizing thing and an incredible human expression of God's love. So many of the children have a deep longing for this acknowledgement, in physical form, that they no doubt deserve yet likely have been depraved of in their short lives. It's a desire that is innate in us. To touch and be touched. A Godly exchange in humanity. These are moments that I cherish, these are moments that I hope God will grant me increasing sensitivity, that I might take note of Him around me.
In other news, we have gotten together for our first time with the Howick Community Church youth, to begin some relationships with them with our ultimate hope to bridge understanding between them and the township youth. Be praying for God's direction and hand in this. Within ourselves we can do nothing. Which is a relief that we can place this in His hands and just make ourselves available.
In other requests, safety here in the township is a risk that we cannot ignore. So long as we keep our wits about us and stay street-wise, we are just fine. There have been some trip ups, so we could definitely use some prayer with that regard!
Major praise to acknowledge. The Mpophomeni Family Center ministry, it's staff, social workers, child care, are amazing! God's hand is upon this ministry, and boy is it apparent. It astounds me how perfectly each staffer fits their roles, the way their skills and passions match up to exactly what is expected of them! They are seriously some of the most incredible people I know. If there is one thing that I would love to emerge from this summer with, would be the knowledge that we provided these brothers and sisters in Christ an encouragement. Time to wrap it up, much love and peace to you all. Hopefully we can keep you updated a bit better this coming week! Sala Kahle!
Monday, June 27, 2011
5 days in
Hello Mother, Father, dearest family and friends,
I am writing you from the computer here at the Mpophomeni Family Centre. It is my 5th day here in Mpophomeni. I adjusted quite quickly with regards to my sleep cycles. After that first night, I have slept during the normal hours and have had restful sleep which has been a blessing to hit the ground running with little to no exhaustion. Friday we took part in a staff retreat with approximately 30-40 combined staffworkers. It is exciting to see how God has grown and changed the ministry here in Mpophomeni. The Family Centre combined with the Ethembeni AIDS/HIV care centre is now the second largest employer in the township behind only the municipality which employs the police, and garbage disposal etc. That is a huge accomplishment for bringing the Kingdom here in the township considering that 80% of the township is unemployed. So much more growth and change is on it's way. Saturday we had a day in Durban since the Family Centre is closed on the weekends. Spent some time seeing old sites that we had seen in our previous time here. Being here is paired with interesting emotions, very different from last spring in good ways. Much less of a honeymoon experience and one more of real life exposure. It is a blessing and gift to wake up among the people that we desire to understand --> love --> work alongside. Who knows where God will take this 2 months,I just hope to maintain an attentiveness to His direction and not our own, so that what HE desires for His people will be accomplished through people small such as our team. That would be a humbling experience to be a part of. I feel so much joy living in community with God's children young and old, black and white, HIV infected/not. Please pray for God's vision to continue to take over our eyes, hands and feet here. Sunday was a day of worship and rest @ Mpophomeni International Church. So much freedom for my heart was found there. Worshiping God uninhibited is a powerful thing to witness and be a part of. The service was approx 3 hours but felt like a bat of the eye. We had 50 guests from sister churches, as this was a commissioning Sunday of sorts. MCI had been worshiping in a tent outside of the Centre for several years, but recently due to growth needed a change. This Sunday was their first @ an old tavern. Taverns in the township are dangerous places of intoxication and also violence. Multiple muders had occured in this building and now we were claiming the building for God's Kingdom. Many brothers and sisters (bhutis and usisis)shared a great vision of restoration and reconcilliation. This is exemplified by the transformation of the building, but also the many hearts impacted. These people will be quite impactful on my life, the Spirit is just flowing out of them.
With regards to accomodations/diet, (this is for you Ma.) the five of us are staying a five minutes walk away from the Centre in a home approximately the size of our living room and dining room combined @ Trillium. No oven, but a electric burner and microwave to heat food. My diet has been steadied by @ least 4 cups of coffee or Roibos tea each day. Cornflakes in the morning, pb and j @ noon, and then a more substantial meal at night such as mac and cheese, or grilled cheese etc.We have no heat or warm water, so that is deturrent enough not to take a shower, especially when the temps are in the mid thirties at night. It's okay though because during the day it barely scrapes 70 (quite comfortable actually) thus I don't sweat which is pleanant. We will manage to get to Howick (small community 10 minutes east of here) and Claire's cottage(the British missionary)and hot showers about once a week. Welp that is all for now. Time to get busy. I will hopefully have internet access twice weekly. I appreciate emails and updates from you all as well! My email is robertverwys@gmail.com .Trusting God is sustaining and growing in you all where you are called this summer! Love you all.
(p.s. Mother could you call Mac Bank and confirm that I am in South Africa until late August so they do not freeze my account? thanks!)
inKosi Mayibe Nawe (God bless you) Sala Kahle (Stay well)
Themba- Sipho -Njabulo VerWys
I am writing you from the computer here at the Mpophomeni Family Centre. It is my 5th day here in Mpophomeni. I adjusted quite quickly with regards to my sleep cycles. After that first night, I have slept during the normal hours and have had restful sleep which has been a blessing to hit the ground running with little to no exhaustion. Friday we took part in a staff retreat with approximately 30-40 combined staffworkers. It is exciting to see how God has grown and changed the ministry here in Mpophomeni. The Family Centre combined with the Ethembeni AIDS/HIV care centre is now the second largest employer in the township behind only the municipality which employs the police, and garbage disposal etc. That is a huge accomplishment for bringing the Kingdom here in the township considering that 80% of the township is unemployed. So much more growth and change is on it's way. Saturday we had a day in Durban since the Family Centre is closed on the weekends. Spent some time seeing old sites that we had seen in our previous time here. Being here is paired with interesting emotions, very different from last spring in good ways. Much less of a honeymoon experience and one more of real life exposure. It is a blessing and gift to wake up among the people that we desire to understand --> love --> work alongside. Who knows where God will take this 2 months,I just hope to maintain an attentiveness to His direction and not our own, so that what HE desires for His people will be accomplished through people small such as our team. That would be a humbling experience to be a part of. I feel so much joy living in community with God's children young and old, black and white, HIV infected/not. Please pray for God's vision to continue to take over our eyes, hands and feet here. Sunday was a day of worship and rest @ Mpophomeni International Church. So much freedom for my heart was found there. Worshiping God uninhibited is a powerful thing to witness and be a part of. The service was approx 3 hours but felt like a bat of the eye. We had 50 guests from sister churches, as this was a commissioning Sunday of sorts. MCI had been worshiping in a tent outside of the Centre for several years, but recently due to growth needed a change. This Sunday was their first @ an old tavern. Taverns in the township are dangerous places of intoxication and also violence. Multiple muders had occured in this building and now we were claiming the building for God's Kingdom. Many brothers and sisters (bhutis and usisis)shared a great vision of restoration and reconcilliation. This is exemplified by the transformation of the building, but also the many hearts impacted. These people will be quite impactful on my life, the Spirit is just flowing out of them.
With regards to accomodations/diet, (this is for you Ma.) the five of us are staying a five minutes walk away from the Centre in a home approximately the size of our living room and dining room combined @ Trillium. No oven, but a electric burner and microwave to heat food. My diet has been steadied by @ least 4 cups of coffee or Roibos tea each day. Cornflakes in the morning, pb and j @ noon, and then a more substantial meal at night such as mac and cheese, or grilled cheese etc.We have no heat or warm water, so that is deturrent enough not to take a shower, especially when the temps are in the mid thirties at night. It's okay though because during the day it barely scrapes 70 (quite comfortable actually) thus I don't sweat which is pleanant. We will manage to get to Howick (small community 10 minutes east of here) and Claire's cottage(the British missionary)and hot showers about once a week. Welp that is all for now. Time to get busy. I will hopefully have internet access twice weekly. I appreciate emails and updates from you all as well! My email is robertverwys@gmail.com .Trusting God is sustaining and growing in you all where you are called this summer! Love you all.
(p.s. Mother could you call Mac Bank and confirm that I am in South Africa until late August so they do not freeze my account? thanks!)
inKosi Mayibe Nawe (God bless you) Sala Kahle (Stay well)
Themba- Sipho -Njabulo VerWys
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Untitled
As I sit here and begin to write, it's approaching 1 am in the morning... The perfect time to begin a new blog post, of all things. I am sensing a trend, or habit in myself. Blogging only seems to occur when I have exhausted all possible procrastinatory (new word apparently) resources warding off sleep, but having no work tomorrow can't sleep. Maybe it is the excited little kid in me. (I remember my expecting to be allowed to stay up til my age on my birthdays. Which was all hunky-dory until I hit 12, then it was just stupid. That's neither here nor there.) Anyways, I cannot help but chuckle as I read aspirations and recognize shortcomings and unmet expectations I placed on this past semester in my prior posting. Water under the bridge I say. But in that same breath, It would be amiss not to recognize God's faithfulness and provision when I didn't have the will power to "deal" with my South Africa ish in my own parameters.
The spring semester was a whirlwind (surprise) of busyness, but of the fruitful, life-giving, and joy instilling kind. A stark contrast to life last fall. I felt as if I had sucker-punched, gasping for air and breath, that seemed to never fill my lungs. Empty and hollow. So much to do in so little time. So many obligations to meet, people to see, assignments and papers to complete, so few hours in a day. My social work classes had seemed to do their best to keep me from actually having time to go out and apply the skills I had been learning. This depravity soon progressed into guilt and despair. I was longing to do SO much, and see God glorified in as many areas of my life as possible. Yet, I was paralyzed from even taking one step forward. I was confronted with a mountain of tasks and situations that I felt God desired me to accomplish and take part in, but because of the sheer gravity of what lay ahead, I was left frozen in my steps. I tried to do it by myself. Go it alone. I'll be just "fine." Gotta do it the dutch, independent, emotionless way... Never admitting my faults and struggles within my present reality. That's when I finally broke and my hero Jesus Christ came and began picking up my pieces. There was no way I was going to meet expectations, accomplish tasks, be present in relationships on my own... So why did I even try, when my intentions (or at least part) was to bring God glory? My blooming pride. I drowned in it, by my own choice and doing... but God was not through with me and never did He leave me. He actually drew me to Himself and cradled me in His arms. Wow, God you are good. Phew. This whole writing thoughts out is something I should make into a habit.
The way I see it, we are vessels with our primary purpose on this earth being to bring God the MOST glory we possibly can in the time we are given. Maximizing the potential, talents and gifts He instills us with. I just got this picture in my head of what God was working in me last fall. He was dumping me out. I was a vessel then as I am now, but I was a vessel that was full of me. He has to dump me out and empty me, in order to fill me with Him. I believe in my heart that last fall He began to have His way more than ever. (praise God!) By no means is the process of being emptied near completion, and I think it will be a life-long, uphill battle... But boy does it feel good to begin allowing Him to further purge me of me.
It was like a fresh breeze rushed over me, reviving my deadened body, heart and soul.
The fullness of His joy was being restored. God blessed me this spring. The classes that were so empty now gave me purpose. The relationships that were obligations and just another thing on my checklist, only further exposed me to the depth of Christ's unconditional love. Hallelujah. I feel it in the core of me...HIS LIFE!
Okay, that just got me the heeby-jeebies writing that... Back to the present. Through this journey God confronted me with so much of my South African experience that I had so struggled to unpack on my own.
I now sit at the cusp of a summer of even greater unknowns, yet rest in the promise that God is already there. He's been preparing Mpophomeni, Kwazulu-Natal South Africa, just as I trust He has been preparing and shaping me for what lay ahead. I desire that God will be the only one glorified this summer. I pray He will give me more than I can handle, in order that I may be humbled by the recognition of His provision and abounding grace and mercy. That He would provide His SHALOM to chaos and turmoil that is bound to be present. His understanding to our mortal confusion. His restoration to our divisiveness. His healing to my (our) wounds. That it may be in Mpophomeni as it is in Heaven.
"He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less."
-John 3:30 (New Living Translation)
The spring semester was a whirlwind (surprise) of busyness, but of the fruitful, life-giving, and joy instilling kind. A stark contrast to life last fall. I felt as if I had sucker-punched, gasping for air and breath, that seemed to never fill my lungs. Empty and hollow. So much to do in so little time. So many obligations to meet, people to see, assignments and papers to complete, so few hours in a day. My social work classes had seemed to do their best to keep me from actually having time to go out and apply the skills I had been learning. This depravity soon progressed into guilt and despair. I was longing to do SO much, and see God glorified in as many areas of my life as possible. Yet, I was paralyzed from even taking one step forward. I was confronted with a mountain of tasks and situations that I felt God desired me to accomplish and take part in, but because of the sheer gravity of what lay ahead, I was left frozen in my steps. I tried to do it by myself. Go it alone. I'll be just "fine." Gotta do it the dutch, independent, emotionless way... Never admitting my faults and struggles within my present reality. That's when I finally broke and my hero Jesus Christ came and began picking up my pieces. There was no way I was going to meet expectations, accomplish tasks, be present in relationships on my own... So why did I even try, when my intentions (or at least part) was to bring God glory? My blooming pride. I drowned in it, by my own choice and doing... but God was not through with me and never did He leave me. He actually drew me to Himself and cradled me in His arms. Wow, God you are good. Phew. This whole writing thoughts out is something I should make into a habit.
The way I see it, we are vessels with our primary purpose on this earth being to bring God the MOST glory we possibly can in the time we are given. Maximizing the potential, talents and gifts He instills us with. I just got this picture in my head of what God was working in me last fall. He was dumping me out. I was a vessel then as I am now, but I was a vessel that was full of me. He has to dump me out and empty me, in order to fill me with Him. I believe in my heart that last fall He began to have His way more than ever. (praise God!) By no means is the process of being emptied near completion, and I think it will be a life-long, uphill battle... But boy does it feel good to begin allowing Him to further purge me of me.
It was like a fresh breeze rushed over me, reviving my deadened body, heart and soul.
The fullness of His joy was being restored. God blessed me this spring. The classes that were so empty now gave me purpose. The relationships that were obligations and just another thing on my checklist, only further exposed me to the depth of Christ's unconditional love. Hallelujah. I feel it in the core of me...HIS LIFE!
Okay, that just got me the heeby-jeebies writing that... Back to the present. Through this journey God confronted me with so much of my South African experience that I had so struggled to unpack on my own.
I now sit at the cusp of a summer of even greater unknowns, yet rest in the promise that God is already there. He's been preparing Mpophomeni, Kwazulu-Natal South Africa, just as I trust He has been preparing and shaping me for what lay ahead. I desire that God will be the only one glorified this summer. I pray He will give me more than I can handle, in order that I may be humbled by the recognition of His provision and abounding grace and mercy. That He would provide His SHALOM to chaos and turmoil that is bound to be present. His understanding to our mortal confusion. His restoration to our divisiveness. His healing to my (our) wounds. That it may be in Mpophomeni as it is in Heaven.
"He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less."
-John 3:30 (New Living Translation)
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